HOMESTEADING in the CALM EYE of the STORM: A Therapist Navigates His Complex PTSD

Thank you Pete Walker! I've recently started my long journey to recover from CPTSD. I have been looking for real true answers for a very long time. As a mature women I realize it's never to late. I'm not as scared to deal with all the pain and speechless horror as I used to be because of your books. Even though I know that I wasn't alone in the world with the traumas that I secretly hid, there was no one out there speaking about the tabo subjects. I have found a good therapist , when I called about my marriage problems., she says to me that she specializes in trauma patients, I thought, that's nice, as I smirked to myself, and wondered why she would tell me this. My goal in therapy was to learn to cry again, as numbness had become quite comfortable and angry was stepping up to bat. As she showed me your books and I begain to read your warm and transparent words, I begain to cry again, and laugh with you and hope again. I can't wait for my life to thrive as it was meant to be Thank you, thank you, thank you! Mistakes are my teachers. Every misstep is a chance to practice self-compassion. Pg. 228 Ps. Your poetry is beautiful. Your adventures are encouraging. It's a true honor to know the deepest of Pete Walker through your words. Your journey is a gift to all of us that feel as if we were left stranded on the dark and lonely side of the roads of life. Thank you again, with my whole heart!

Very few authors have connected with me in the way Pete Walker’s books have. His ability to personalize the experiences of Complex PTSD are truly unique in relating to others whose trauma leaves them feeling isolated and alone in a world seldom understood by the world around us. His ability to offer hope and healing for people with developmental suffering provides a roadmap to recovery that has been foundational in my own personal journey. It is a must-read for those of us whose lives have been impacted by the scars we bear from childhood trauma.

Pete Walkers bipgraphy should be required reading for all trauma soecialists Pete expertly links all the issues trauma survivors have. That includes the issue of codependency and then, of course the inevitable boundary issues. In clear eleoquent stories Pete Walker links the early trauma with the repetition compulsion. Moreover he brings in the neurological issues associated with chronic post traumtic stress disorder. No other book gives a survivor the complete panorama of the legacy of trauma. Through thick and thin Pete Walker works through the complex recovery from childhood trauma. Moreover he relates why and how few therapists are able to treat patients Illuminating, resourceful but most of all full of hope

Memoirs are my absolute go-to genre of books and plenty of them devolve into suffering porn (some done so well that you enjoy them that way, others not so much). Walker graciously doesn't lay heavy emotional pulls on his readers in this memoir as his story serves more as a teaching purpose to lay out recovery methods. Psychology had us believing for decades that dysfunctional families were the minority and now we're learning that's just not so (although there is such a spectrum). Walker normalizes the real life consequences of managing C-PTSD 4-F defense mechanisms while showing that he's had a bountiful, busy life all the while. No quick fixes (only user directed processes), no minimization of long term and wide ranging effects of early abuse/neglect, and no fetishizing (idealizing genuine suffering as somehow exotic, cool, or fascinating) cloud his retelling. Early childhood attachment disorders frequently dog a person throughout life and take much perseverance often in multiple modalities of one's choosing to lessen and resolve the impact. Walker-- like most of us-- fumbled through both helpful and unhelpful ways of coping before truly identifying what's been missing in order to directly find ways of healing. I didn't rate this at 5 stars because 1) I didn't find his writing to be transforming enough for me to feel like I was right there in the people, places, things he experienced; 2) he didn't define his terms on calling his parents narcissistic (either having high narcissistic traits or bona fide narcissism-- and what that means to him); and 3) I think it can hinder a person's recovery to assume that the universe would randomly curse some people with bad parenting influences-- that as a spirit coming into form we had zero input whatsoever for what circumstances would set up our life here considerably. However, he did an excellent job of presenting himself as an everyman with on the ground human experiences instead of exclusively a successful white-collared professional therapist who somehow existed above the fray by the miracle of more elevated thought training than the clueless masses. Furthermore, he boldly called out organized religions and counseling professions for routinely shaming and misunderstanding the broad implications of the role of grief in the human person as felt naturally from all meaningful losses occurring throughout one's lifespan. Bravo!

Pete Walker has already in previous books shown a clear light on the extremely important question, "How can I recover from serious childhood abuse?" In this book, he tells the very personal story of his slow realization in his young adult years that he had suffered greatly as a child, and of his search for and discovery of authentic ways to heal. In the process, he charms us with humor and makes us wince at his sometimes dangerous decisions, born of his traumatic history. But there is an ending that is both happy and inspiring because it is actually true! And...if he can do it...if he can learn to live a life full (mostly) of love and service after all that he lived through as a child, then surely the rest of us can too!

I really appreciate reading this as I am thinking of becoming a therapist myself but I'm not sure if I am good enough to do it. Reading this was really insightful as to how a really skilled therapist like Pete Walker can still struggle at times and have their own issues while still doing their best to provide effective therapy and support to others. I also really appreciate his vulnerability as to how his relationships have progressed over time, it's not easy to admit how long it takes to let go of compulsively repeating past abuse in current relationships.

If Pete's Complex PTSD book was your introduction to him, this will be a different flavor. Those who admire Pete's work will enjoy a grounding and humanizing view of the man who has helped so many overcome childhood trauma through his practice and useful books.

Having previously read Walker's book on C-PTSD, which more than any other book I'd read helped me identify and understand my trauma symptoms, I recently discovered his wonderfully written autobiography. It was very helpful to see how he worked through his own recovery journey. It helps to have concrete examples to emulate in my own healing journey. As a C-PTSD survivor with a 4F flight-fawn pattern, I sometimes found myself wondering how he got into my head and discovered my own thoughts! Walker's sharing is highly relatable, sensitive, vulnerable, honest, deep, helpful and above all, compassionate.

I picked up this book because I'm reading Pete Walker's CPTSD manual, which is excellent, but so mind blowing I can only take in a few pages at a time. I thought this would help me get into it laterally. Homesteading is an interesting book, but having read many therapist's memoirs, it was a little unusual. Walker spends only a few pages on his childhood, with exactly 3 anecdotes, and then he's off. Off to see the world, as a Vietnam war soldier, then hitchhiking like a beat poet (and then like a hippie). He goes from crossing the US to San Francisco to Morocco to Europe to Turkey, Iran, Afghanistan (where he gets arrested) to Thailand (where he gets conned by a monk) to Bali to Australia (where he lives for 10 years). He is a true die hard flower power child of the 60s, and that in itself is an interesting, already historical tale. On the way, he reads books, gets high, learns to make friends, looks for enlightenment, adopts a dog, they've on communal living (but not open love), learns astrology and how to fix cars, meditation, Buddhism/Hinduism, seesaws between wonder, running and depression - which all help him get closer to the core of his search - why does he feel so bad? How should I phrase this? This is not a literary book - things and people pop in and out of the book in a somewhat disjointed manner. You don't get developmental arcs (ironically), the old storytelling chestnut of building tension in order to release it, thus eliciting a pleasurable feeling in your reader. Walker does not talk about his parents or early years, so we don't really get the genesis of his issues, or their width and breath - and thus can't really follow him with bated breath and expectation. New people, issues and situations roll out in from of us as if on an escalator. It lacks a bit of dynamic - ie, *here's a problem *hero strives * hero finds the solution! However, that's ok - but also the reason I'm only giving the book 4 stars. Walker's search is genuine, devouring and must of course turn inward, no matter how colorful his external life is. Internal landscapes are more complex and opaque than backpackers' tales. I have been on many of the paths he's taken (astrology - of course he's a Sagittarius. I'm guessing his rising is Aquarius if his busy midheaven is in Scorpio. I also have a Scorpio moon, a Water Bearer Ascendant and a Fire sun sign) (Asia - I've lived in Thailand for 9 years)(leaving the Catholic church)(therapy... Well, duh) (hippyism) etc Because I have learned/am still learning so much from this man, because he wrote one of the 2 best books on CPTSD that exist, because he is fiercely compassionate and actually created psychological tools to help us heal, I have the utmost respect for him. I will always read his books. There are many gems in this one. I particularly LOVE him blasting spiritual bypassing and mandatory 'forgiveness'. He doesn't go on a deep dive to 'understand' his parents and give them 'light and compassion'. THANK YOU. He doesn't excavate their family history (which can if course be useful for some), he remains resolutely self-focused, which is the right place to be when you are healing from a childhood like his. This is a great read it you're into any of those subjects, the 60s-70s, traveling around the world, self-healing, CPTSD, and open hearted authenticity and observation

This book is such a delight! After having read both "Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving" and "The Tao of Fully Feeling", it has added yet another deeper dimension and even more colour to the personality of Pete Walker. I am endlessly grateful for what this man has lived and shared with the humans!! Bless his heart for being a patron saint of CPTSD survivors and helping to navigate this world in such a rich fulfilling manner!

Unbelievably heartbreaking and life changing. Thank you Pete Walker for all three of your books read and listened to many many times.

I first read Pete Walkers CPTSD book - which kickstarted me taking some vital steps in my own recovery. This memoir - I could not read fast enough - I devoured page after page after page. His way of articulating the complexity and insidious nature of CPTSD is unlike any other I have read. I feel so SEEN and understood by a complete stranger, like I have less shame about my own experience, knowing these symptoms are COMMON amongst those who grew up in disruptive family homes with toxic parents. I’m so grateful for Pete’s writing. His exercises and suggestions as well for how to overcome CPTSD have been so helpful. Including learning to recognize my chronic compulsion and busyness as escapism from feeling - a sort of flight mode. I plan to read the Tao of Fully Feeling next. Thank you Pete

This book makes sense of so many things and is a timely exposure of the idea that everything can be solved with love and peace. It clearly shows that PTSD is often caused by some truly nasty people, be they parents, partners or colleagues. Anger, expressed in safe ways that harm no one - Pete Walker has many brilliant ideas for this- is an absolutely appropriate response. Furthermore, sometimes forgiveness is not an option. It can be better to just walk away. A deeply empowering book. Best read in conjunction with Pete Walker's brilliant book on healing PTSD.