How to Stop Being a Narcissist: Real and Proven Strategies to Change Narcissistic / Manipulative Behavior and Stop Sabotaging Your Relationships

I bought the book “How To Stop Being A Narcissist” to give to my husband because I believe he has narcissistic tendencies, but as I am reading this book I also have some of these tendencies as a result from having an alcoholic mother when I was growing up. Many of the ideas in this book hit home with me and I’ve only finished Chapter 7. I feel both my husband and myself will benefit from reading this book and putting into practice its ideas. Thank you for writing this book.

This is a wonderful book that has helped me enormously. For those suffering from narcissism it offers true hope for a better life.

Such a good picture of what is needed to make the steps to improve. Practical and helpful. Will definitely help me.

It's unfortunate that the author speaks to overt narcissistic traits and doesn't also explain covert narcissism. Culturally, we associate narcissism with the more obvious, inflated, grandiose, arrogant type. Most people (including and especially victims of narcissistic abuse) won't recognize covert narcissism for what it is -- preventing them from uncovering resources for getting help (prolonging the devastating effects of things like manipulation, gaslighting, and other forms of abuse). Likewise, a covert narcissist who is curious about the consequences of their behaviors, or the feedback they're receiving from a loved one -- someone who is open to taking accountability and working toward change might end up dismissing the possibility when they don't identify with the overt traits listed at the beginning. Also, the book starts by saying that anyone who is wondering if they might be a narcissist probably isn't one. Why write a book that seeks to educate and support this population (for whom one of the symptoms is a lack of insight and accountability) and then suggest they probably don't have the issue simply because they're open to reading the book? Outside of this, I think the book is excellent. It's compassionate and approaches the subject with dignity and respect. People with NPD or NP traits are behaving as they are from a wounded place -- it's a maladaptive pattern of protection that hurts others (whereas their victims are often/also using maladaptive patterns of protection that hurt themselves). Both deserve compassion and both deserve treatment. I appreciate that this author has found a way to encourage accountability and change while also honoring the humanity and worthiness of the reader who struggles with these issues -- especially because there's already so much shame. (Including the shame of having hurt people they love.) This prevents many addicts from entering recovery, too. Anyone who recognizes these traits within themselves and is willing to do the work to heal and change has my utmost respect.

Wonderful good and very helpful. Written clearly and is entertaining to read.

Will set you straight on what characterizes a narcissist. My wife accused me of being one. Upon reading it, I realized it was her! It lead me to look more closely at my finances and led me to divorce her and sue her for embezzlement! These people create their own version of reality and gaslight the hell out of you! The cover is all you really need to read to get the bottom line! But good read.

I was optimistic about this book but after I began reading it quickly realized that the author is conflating symptoms of other mental health disorders with NPD. For example emotional dysregulation and pathological lying. Those are not symptoms of NPD. in the chapter on building empathy skills, the author goes on multiple times about exposing yourself to different cultures and different types of people and at one point says not to have “creepy eye contact”. Exposing yourself to other cultures isn’t a strategy for building empathy skills if you have any mental health disorder that causes that to be a challenge for you. This book is insulting. It seems like the author has an axe to grind against someone who they deem to be a narcissist. Being averse to cultures you are unfamiliar with has nothing to do with building empathy and people with NPD are no more likely than anyone else to have a “creepy stare” not to mention that is just insulting and unhelpful if the author really did intend to provide useful advice to someone struggling with narcissistic personality disorder. Simply put, the author is not a professional qualified to speak on this mental health disorder and this is yet another book advertised as something to help those with NPD but is yet another bashing session of them as evil and bad. No other mental health disorder is routinely mischaracterized and spoke of so insultingly. Can’t imagine anyone writing a book about adhd people where they spend the entire time talking about how bad they are and how they ruin everyone’s lives, even though those with adhd are just as challenging to live with and harm those they love. For some reason there are no books out there that I have found actually intended to help those with NPD grow and improve their own lives. So if you’ve diagnosed someone in your life as a narcissist, (because that’s a catch phrase everyone likes to throw around when they don’t like someone) and you want to confirm you’re right that they’re evil and bad, go ahead and read this book. If you actually have NPD and are looking for a useful book to help you improve your life and have more successful relationships, this isn’t it.

This book is full of tools and techniques to use to better yourself. It’s a book that most of the world could stand to read because the issues it touches on aren’t just things only narcissistic people deal with. The everyday person struggles with defensiveness for example and this book highlights ways to combat it to form healthy habits.

Thank you

Hello Erik, Thank you very much for sharing this knowledge with the rest of the humans! It has benefit me a lot and I am looking forward mostly to become normal and healthy. All best

Okay ready. Expected a longer more detailed book but this was still informative

This is the most in depth and insightful book I have read on narcissism. Not leaving you alone to figure some of this out yourself and practical help and advise on how to change your behaviour. I read with highlighters in hand and put to use with a clear plan made and I know I will reread over and over for continued improvement

The material for people who have narcissistic tendencies and looking for self-help is very limited so in such an environment this is a really useful book. But the problem is it has a lot of repetition and therefore it really can use a good editor. There were so many sections that I kind of failed to read as same things were repeated several times without adding too much additional context. I would recommend the writer to really shorten the book by making it leaner and also having a good editor reviewing the text.