Symptoms of Being Human: A Powerful YA Debut About a Genderfluid Teen and Coming Out

I really loved this book. I was so happy that I was part of the Sunday Street Team for this book, and was able to review an eARC from Edelweiss. This book was definitely 5 out of 5 stars in my opinion. This is a diverse novel, with the main character identifying as gender fluid. The story really sucks you in. A few things throughout the book were kind of predictable, at least to me, but I think I’m a pretty good guesser at what’s going to happen in a book. I loved seeing the world through Riley’s eyes, learning more about what being gender fluid really means. The writing was unique and absolutely beautiful. My stomach was full of butterflies, and a smile overtook my face often while reading. I even cried some. Besides my enormous love for Riley, I really liked Bec as well. Solo was okay at parts, especially towards the last half of the book. Riley’s parents annoyed me here and there throughout the book. They were too demanding; helicopter parents always hovering and bugging Riley. I thought the blog posts were really interesting and informative. The romance wasn’t very prominent in the book, but I loved it nevertheless. The pairing was absolutely adorable. I didn’t find any book boyfriends in this book, but it was definitely still worth the read. The parts where I cried, my heart felt like it was breaking. I don’t want to say what happened, because it would spoil the book, but wow, just wow. Some of my favorite lines: “‘Why does that make you think I’m from the Midwest?’ Solo shrugs. ‘Where else could you develop such contempt for traditional American values?'” and “Ten minutes later we’re speeding down the freeway, Solo’s hatchback shuddering like a porta-potty in a 5.0 magnitude earthquake.” and “‘As for wondering if it’s okay to be who you are–that’s not a symptom of mental illness. That’s a symptom of being a person.'” Final note: Jeff did an amazing job with his debut book, and I’d highly recommend it to anyone who loves diverse books. I loved it so much that I had to buy a hardcover copy for my personal library! Check it out!

I am the mom of a trans kid and a queer kid. I am genderqueer myself, however, growing up in the 80s, you weren’t allowed to do anything but fit in or be a freak. I chose the latter then. I admire the options kids have today, but my heart also hurts for the pain all folks who don’t fit the “normal” mode must go through. Riley’s story explained genderfluid in a way that made sense to me, and it gave me a frame of reference for understanding gender dysphoria. As a parent, I fumbled alongside Riley’s parents, grateful that my kids felt comfortable coming out to us and grateful we didn’t make too many missteps along the way. Everyone should read this book, though there are parts that are so so painful. I look forward to a day when being queer/trans/genderfluid does not mean accepting abuse and assault. I pray my kids never experience sexual assault or hate crimes. I pray for our queer/trans/genderfluid kids, that they have a better life. Please read this book and pass it along.

I bought this book for a 30 days of Pride book review project. This is that review. “The first thing you’re going to want to know about me is: Am I a boy, or am I a girl?” Our first glimpse into our POV character Riley’s mind is an observation, presented almost as an accusation. The answer to that question is, “Both or Neither.” Riley is gender fluid, and about to start an anonymous blog, on the advice of a therapist (Dr. Anne), to vent the pent up feelings that inevitably arise from that identity, while living in a very binary society, especially when you add high-school and a prominent political family into the mix. We get to ride around in Riley’s head, facing parents who just don’t get it, braving the first day transferring to a new school, and walking what is described as “The Gauntlet” through an unfriendly lunch area every day. The real and imagined judgements of the outside world rain down upon us. We meet other outcasts, such as Solo, the nerd turned jock, whose sheer size shifted his social standing, and the “mysterious” Bec, who Riley constantly tries to define as “friend” or “more-than-friend,” with all the requisite teenage angst and self-deprecation. We, as it turns out, have been invited to walk in on Riley at a very transformative and eventful time in life. In fact, though the story takes place over a really short span, maybe only a month or two, Riley has some life altering experiences in that time, some more traumatic than others. There was a lot to like about this book. Riley is a fully realized and relatable character, and a hopeful, anxious, flawed, but very human face for gender fluidity, an often misunderstood and still underrepresented demographic. Because non-binary gender is messy, complicated and controversial, it becomes hard to talk about, but there are many teenagers like Riley who NEED to talk about it, and need to see it being talked about… if nothing else to be reassured that it exists outside of their own heads, that it is real and happening, that they are not alone. Jeff Garvin also manages to write a very apt description of functioning with anxiety. His descriptions of Riley’s impending anxiety attacks, or of the low level buzz of daily anxiety, like a headful of wasps, was just very in tune with my own experiences of dealing with anxiety, being claustrophobic in a crowded room, being overwhelmed by sensory input when your anxiety level is high, like loud sounds or bright lights being almost too much to handle. It seemed to be written by someone who really understood what being (just barely) functionally anxious feels like. It is a book that is very much designed to address issues, but I didn't feel like it forgot about its characters in the process… and (to directly contradict a few reviews that I skimmed after writing this) I never felt it lost the thread of story. Riley is a gender fluid teen in a world where that is not really very understood, so Riley spends a lot of time educating the reader on gender and gender politics, subtly and sometimes really not so subtly, but we are also learning about who Riley is as a human, more than as an example of someone gender fluid. In the end we get to find out, as Riley does, what kind of person Riley is going to be-- seperate from labels like boy, girl, gay, straight, advocate… or victim. I was surprised so many people felt there was no story here. I feel, in a coming of age story, the character development is the story. So, maybe the plot wasn't always in-your-face apparent, but I don't think it is fair to say it was altogether absent. There were a few things that I did struggle with, though. Garvin makes a conscious choice to never reveal Riley’s sex or birth-assigned gender. The point, of course, is that it doesn’t matter because it is divorced from who Riley is. The character Riley is not a boy or a girl. There are no pronouns used. Nobody refers to Riley as the congressman’s son or daughter. When Riley is having moments of gender dysmorphia, or even of attraction to a crush, Riley’s inner monologue never mentions any body parts that might give anything away. Riley describes the gendered clothes that must be worn as the “campaign costume,” and there is never any detail about what they look like or what gender they are enforcing. There is a sort of defiance in this, mirroring and matching Riley’s own defiance and verbal insistence on more than one occasion that it doesn’t matter what genitalia Riley has. And it is of course none of anyone’s business... But there is also something calculated and false about the way it is concealed from the reader. We aren't just a random observer on the street or an anonymous reader of Riley’s blog, we are supposed to be inside the character’s head and this piece of information, that Riley knows and is in fact struggling with, is just absent. For example, when Riley mentions feeling very feminine around Bec… something about Bec turns Riley’s “gender-dial” all the way to female...If Riley’s sex is male, I feel like, Riley is going to be aware of having a penis. To me, that seems like potentially a huge source of gender dysphoria. If Riley is feeling masculine, getting dressed in a way that doesn’t feel too feminine while having to deal with breasts that need flattened down or with menstruation… I feel like those things actually matter. Not revealing Riley’s physical sex or birth-assigned gender or the role Riley’s parents expect Riley to be performing in...it just almost feels like the author doesn’t trust us with the information, and at some points you can feel the intention in it. I understand why Garvin did it, but it was a stumbling block for me in connecting with the character. The other thing for me, which I am aware is petty, were just a couple of typos. I make typos you make typos. It happens...but a missing word or using a mistaken word pulls me out of the story for a minute, and then I have to try to reconnect. And typos in a published work, to me, just seem careless on the part of the editing and publishing teams. And this has nothing to do with anything… but my book has a weird “haircut.” The pages are not cut evenly in a section and stick out beyond the cover at an angle… literally like an asymmetrical haircut. Which isn't really a negative or a positive, except the pages got all bent in shipping and it makes it hard to fit neatly on the bookshelf without dog-earring them further. It's kind of a round peg in a square hole world situation… which I suppose is apt for the novel. Do I recommend this book? I do. It's weird because scanning other reviews, my likes and dislikes seem to be backwards to the other reviewers, my stumbling block was their favourite feature. So, as with anything, it is simply a matter of taste. So, at last, let me throw this book on my two rating scales invented for this project. The first scale I've decided to dub the Queer Counterculture Visibility Scale. It measures how I personally feel this book shines a light on less visible members of the community. Riley is a white upper-middle-class teenager, so Garvin isn't scoring high points right out of the gate, but a POV character that is gender fluid gets a lot of credit on my scale. Garvin also has a teensy little bit of diversity in his side characters. One of the first people Riley befriends is described as brown, and later as Samoan. Riley also interacts briefly with a variety of different transgendered and genderqueer characters. I'm going to weigh it in at: 4 out of 5 stars If only because gender fluidity has been underrepresented, thus far. The second scale I’m just going to call the Genre Expectation scale, and it rates whether this book falls above, below, or pretty much bog-standard for expectations of the genre. This is a young adult, coming of age/ coming out story… and it does what it says on the tin. No genre bending revelations, or spectacular story twists. I think it's a perfectly enjoyable example of its genre. 3 out of 5 stars. It met my expectations.

Thank you! As a parent of a transgender teen and an agender child, this book struck a chord with me. It let me step into Riley's life and live it for a few days. This has given me a new level of understanding. I adore and support my kids, but now I feel like I've lived a little bit of their experiences through Riley. I am so grateful for a book like this. It is sending such a poweful and inspiring message. It has helped me to be even more empathetic. My kids can't always articulate what they feel or what they need. Riley has helped me to understand their feelings. Thank you. I am an avid reader and this was a good book! I'm slightly biased about the subject, but it was well written and flowed seamlessly. I hope you write more. I've shared with all my friends in the LGBTQAP community! I hope it helps you sell even more!! '

Really eye opening book. Very captivating. Read the whole thing in a few hours and cried multiple times. I am gonna read this a few times more.

I loved this. The plot was very much character driven, with lots of exploring of lgbtq+ themes, especially about gender since the main character is genderfluid. I haven't read anything similar and I recommend it.

Loved this book

The thought of having a book with a genderfluid main character made me so happy that I tried to preorder it twice in two months. Having just finished following Riley along a bumpy path of acceptance and identity I am glad to have read such a charming, important book. It's not an easy read. What Riley goes through hurts on a human level. Sometimes, as all teens are, Riley is self-centred and obnoxious. Yet every moment feels believable instead of stilted or forced under some social justice agenda while still being open and informative. If I could go back to my teens and share one book with my teenage self, it would be this one.

So wonderfully written. I gifted this book to a special someone and it was received with such high regard and compliment. Highly suggested read, especially for those that can relate to it.